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Writer's pictureResonate Books

HOMESCHOOL HATERS / February 4

(From "ROUND TWO: The Year Of The Chloe"

 

Dear Journal,

Today is not a very special day. In fact, it’s kind of a sad day. Why? Because today my brother and I begin home-schooling with mom.


Apparently my parents were not satisfied with the amount of learning I was doing at an ALL Chinese language school as a NON-Chinese speaker (surprise, surprise). They finally figured out that being able to understand what your teacher is saying is important. I could have told them that before we even tried it! Speaking of teachers, guess who's responsible for the worst hours of my life now! My own mother! How messed up is that?!


Nothing against my mom. I love my mom and my mom is a good person, but she’s my mom and aren’t kids kind of trained to not really like going to school and not really like their teachers?! Even if your teacher is nice and funny and lets you do cool and fun stuff, they are still responsible for making you stay inside all day and even worse, sit in a seat all day. But that’s not all, teachers make us study and take tests and don’t forget the worst thing of all…do homework! So now the person that all kids should dread the most, lives with me in my own house! Anyone else see a conflict of interest here?!? (Not really sure what that means, but I’ve heard my dad say it a few times).


Update #1

Homeschool is not SO bad. For one thing, it only lasts about 3 hours. We started “class” in our living room today at 9 am and finished by noon! That was pretty cool. And in the afternoon we just went out to play. That was pretty cool. But best of all, I got to go to school in my underwear!!! How cool is that!? :)

And if you think MY school uniform is interesting, you should have seen my little brother’s! He showed up to school as Obi Won Kanobi. Tomorrow I’ll probably be sitting next to one of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! I guess homeschool’s not so bad.


Update #2

My teacher introduced a new classroom rule today: No going to school in just your underwear. Not cool! I threatened to file a complaint with the Principal and here is the conversation that followed:


"You're talking to her." (Mom)


(I looked at dad) "You pay mom's salary, right? So you're the Superintendent?"


"Ha!" mom laughed out loud and dad quickly left the room. Apparently, there are salary issues.


I looked at mom. "Let me guess. You're also the Superintendent?"


"It's nice to meet you, young man," she said smiling, "What's your complaint?"


"The whole system is rigged."


"You're a smart kid. You must have remarkable parents and a really good teacher. Go put on some clothes."


It's going to be a looooooooonnnnnnnngggggggg school year. Later, dad wrote out this Bible verse on a piece of paper and posted it on my wall: Proverbs 1:8-9 "My son, listen to your father when he corrects you, and don’t ignore what your mother teaches you. What you learn from your parents will bring you honor and respect, like a crown or a gold medal."


Dear God, it's funny how the Bible always has something to say to kids. It's like the Bible KNOWS what's best for me or something. It's not easy, God, to have a mom who is also your teacher and your principal AND superintendent, but at least I know they ALL really love me. Help me to earn that crown or gold medal so I can give it to my mom. She really deserves it. Amen.

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